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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25262890">ad astra</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelcakkes/pseuds/angelcakkes'>angelcakkes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alien Hunting, Alternate Universe - Small Town, Fluff, M/M, Noren are very very soft in this, Renjun is wide eyed, Stargazing, Strangers to Lovers, Summer Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 07:00:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>14,944</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25262890</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelcakkes/pseuds/angelcakkes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Jeno goes back to his home in the country and meets one certain starry-eyed boy.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>181</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>ad astra</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hellooooo friends!! It's been a while since I've written anything since I was so busy with zoom uni and just, exhausted over everything going on in the world right now. But I've finally got my swing back and I'm excited to present to you a piece that was actually supposed to be released right after Tongue Tied, but I only finished it now. Hehe. Umm anyway this is a lot different in tone from my previous fic because noren are just very very soft boys in this. I really enjoyed writing Renjun like this - a little fiesty, a little outgoing, but very very curious and soft. I hope you all enjoy!</p><p>Also, please do listen to Vanilla Twilight - Owl City because I listened to it a lot while writing and think it suits the fic very well!</p><p>DISCLAIMER: All characters portrayed in this work are fictional and should therefore be treated as such. Any and all mistakes are mine.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jeno’s grandma’s house is arguably his most favourite place in the world.</p><p>It is – quite literally – a breath of fresh air, far away from the thick smog and pollutants that litter the Seoul city sky. Unlike their sky-high apartment back in the big city, where the towering building falls at the heart of the central business district, his grandparents’ quaint home exists just outside the <em>Sobaeksan</em> mountain range, where vegetation thrives plentifully, and flower fields conquer the landscape.</p><p>It’s an hour’s journey away from the shuttle bus station where Jeno gets dropped off. His grandfather, a man ripened for many years yet as sweet and sturdy as ever, drives up to the curb in his dark-blue pickup truck only minutes after Jeno’s set his foot down, and greets his beloved grandson with a grin. His left incisor is missing, Jeno realises, and his skin has creased over. The old man’s age is finally catching up to him.</p><p>
  <em>How long has it been since Jeno’s last seen the man?</em>
</p><p>“Look at my handsome boy!” His grandfather marvels, kicking open the truck door to greet Jeno with a warm hug. The door whines, clearly from years of exhaustion, and the vehicle shakes as his grandfather hops off. Jeno meets him halfway, the breath knocking out of him as his grandfather claps his back, “you’ve grown up well, haven’t ya? Your gran won’t even recognize you!”</p><p>“You look good too, grandpa. Not a day over 70,” he teases with a smile, pulling away and letting his grandfather stare at his matured features.</p><p>His cheeks aren’t as soft anymore, which his grandfather realizes after a failed attempted to squeeze them. They lay chiselled and flat against his sharp bones, so the old man pats them instead.</p><p>“Not much cheek on ya, but still cheeky, ay?”</p><p>Jeno’s grandfather smiles again, the folds on his cheeks and forehead becoming more apparent. His skin is almost translucent and paper-thin. Jeno doesn’t remember it being like this before.</p><p>
  <em>It’s been quite a while, hasn’t it?</em>
</p><p>“Too long, my son.” His grandfather mutters as if reading Jeno’s thoughts as he guides him toward the truck, “too long.”</p><p> </p><p>The ride back to the home is exactly how Jeno remembers it. For the first half-hour, the roads are barren and still, bordered with meadows for grazing, or plantation for harvesting when the season comes. The motor chains crank and the engine rumbles, drawing the attention of the cows and horses they pass by. Jeno waves to them, and before they have time to respond, the truck rolls down the endless path.</p><p>Past the fields, far away in the distance, the hills and valleys bend into the seamless blue sky, like massive, protruding, bulges of earth. Even further than that, the mountains watch over from its high peaks, like an ominous, shadowy presence that’s both grand yet daunting.</p><p>The next half-hour is a more familiar sight. The landscape gradually opens to civilisation, with rows of houses coming into view. Further down the road, the empty grasslands fill quickly with more houses, shops, cafes, and restaurants. They’re not the only ones anymore, with cars joining in from intersecting lanes and children on bikes hurrying off the road to avoid danger. Just like Seoul, people are bustling about; florists fluttering the petals of the flowers on the porch of their stores, and fruit vendors yelling out the prices of the latest fresh produce. Yet, the atmosphere is serene – less chaos, less commotion. Less grey and grim.</p><p>Jeno doesn’t understand how he’s managed to be away for so long.</p><p>They drive past the school Jeno’s mum attended when she was younger, and still mentions to this day. His eyes trail over it, taking in its dilapidated buildings, its worn edges, as he spots children run in flocks to the small playset just by the fence.</p><p>“They’re making a new one just two streets over, on a wide, empty patch of land,” his grandfather comments from the wheel, eyes fixed on the road, “they’re gonna split it. No more high school and elementary, but two separate establishments.”</p><p>He points back to the school that’s now out of sight, “then, they’re gonna tear her down and make a community college. For the locals,” his grandfather grumbles under his breath, cursing something or the other. He clarifies it to Jeno with less swearing, “they’re gonna make it all high-tech and white. As if something like that belongs here. As if anyone here wants the same industrial jungle nonsense that has plagued the cities.”</p><p>Jeno doesn’t comment on his grandfather’s clear distaste - after all, it’s merely the musings of an old man. But he, himself, cannot say he doesn’t disagree. There are times when the hustle and bustle of Seoul can become suffocating for him too.  </p><p>Soon, the truck rolls up to a small house just outside of the busy town square. The calmness of the neighbourhood is exactly how Jeno remembers it and the park across the street, where Jeno and his brother had marked their initials onto the slide in black permanent marker almost a decade ago, is still visible from where he stands.</p><p>They’re still pulling his luggage out of the back when the front door swings open and his grandma comes waddling out. She takes careful steps down the stairs, then hurries as fast as her withered legs would let her pull Jeno into her arms.</p><p>“My dearest!” She says, pulling him down, “you’re here. You’re finally here!”</p><p>“It’s good to be here grandma.”</p><p>She pulls away, stroking the back of Jeno’s head, before looking behind him, “where’s Jaehyun?”</p><p>“He isn’t coming, remember? He phoned to say he was sorry,” Jeno makes an apologetic face on his brother’s behalf.</p><p>“Ah, yes he did. I remember now,” she looks down for a moment, then back at Jeno, “no matter. I know college is hard. As long as you’re here,” she then brings her hand up to fix his fringe. “you stuck your head out the window, didn’t you?”</p><p>Jeno smooths down his hair, smiling sheepishly at the ground.</p><p>“You, your brother, your grandad – all of you, so unkempt all the time!” The old woman chides, her gentle voice melting the icy words. She takes his hand in her own, wrinkled and soft ones, and leads him into the house.</p><p> </p><p>On the first night, after a dinner of his favourite potato pancakes and kimchi stew, Jeno trudges to his room, stepping heavily up the stairs thanks to a body weighed down by too much food. His grandparents had Jeno move into Jaehyun’s room for the visit, seeing as Jeno’s old room is no longer fit for a high school graduate. He’d grown out of his <em>Disney Cars </em>phase a long time ago.</p><p>Jaehyun’s room is bigger and more spacious, with minimal furniture but just enough needed to make it comfortable. The baseball glove chair from when Jeno was a child is still at the corner of the room, well dusted and looking not a day older. His grandma likes to keep busy around the house.</p><p>The king-sized bed – all white and the duvet cloud-like – is pushed up to the window. Pushing the door shut behind him, Jeno throws himself onto the soft covers, groaning from the swirling heat in his stomach from all the spicy food.</p><p>After rolling over onto his stomach, then back again, he pushes himself up to close the curtains. The sky is a rich navy, filled with glittery stars, and a mighty, glowing moon – a sight Jeno rarely gets to see in the city. He holds the drape loosely in his fingers, leaning against the frame to stare out over the houses, then the meadows, then the mountains – all shrouded in darkness.</p><p>Light flickers from the corner of his eye, almost like a camera lens shining, or a mirror reflecting the moon. He turns to the window of the neighbouring house – the Lee household, if he remembers correctly – and finds the window dark and shut. The source of light – had it been from there, to begin with – is gone, and it’s just Jeno and the moonlight. With one last scan over the landscape, he draws the curtains shut.</p><p>-</p><p>The following morning, as the bright sun slowly climbs the sky, Jeno asks about the Lee family. It’s only him and his grandma at breakfast, seated beside each other on the small wooden table, with his grandpa having set out for the farm earlier than dawn. His grandma pushes more steamed-egg onto his plate and tops it with ketchup.</p><p>“Oh, they moved 2 years ago,” she tells him as he breaks away at the egg, gathering some sauce onto his spoon, “little Donghyuck grew fed up of the country-side, especially the school. He wanted to move to the city to study, but his parents couldn’t bear to part with him, so they left too.”</p><p>Jeno hums, wordlessly taking in the new information. For as long as he can remember, every summer he visited before the long gap, a young Jeno would spend most of his days clinging to Donghyuck’s warm fingers as the bronzed boy led him around, conducting mischief in every corner he turned to. Jeno distinctly remembers his laugh – this shrill cackle that elicited from his mouth as he threw his head back, revelling in his mischief. He remembers his last visit, at the age of 12, as clear as if it were only yesterday –  going fishing with his grandad and Donghyuck, when the cheeky boy knelt on the edge of the boat despite being warned against it, then, toppling into the water with a splash. Naturally, Jeno had cried thinking Donghyuck was gone for good, and even when the young boy emerged from the water, shaking his head like a dog, it took a tight, wet hug for Jeno to calm down.</p><p>“He kept saying he missed you. I’ve always been meaning to give him your house number, but he’d left before I remembered to,” Jeno’s grandma excuses herself and shuffles to her room, leaving Jeno by himself, with cold, half-eaten eggs and the sound of the ceiling-fan dangerously rattling as it spins.</p><p>A thought arises, and he wishes he had come back more often. If they hadn’t gotten so busy; if Jeno’s dad hadn’t gotten that new and fancy, but more demanding job. If Jaehyun wasn’t so busy with college, he thinks maybe Donghyuck could’ve been a closer friend.</p><p>His grandmother emerges from her bedroom with a small slip, setting it before Jeno as she takes his plate away, “He left that, told me to call him if this house started to feel too quiet, and that he’d sing for me. He’d gotten interested in that the years before they left, and would come over in the afternoons with his music player to sing with me.” She closes her eyes, reliving the memory behind shut eyelids, and wags a finger, “His voice would fill the room, so beautiful.”</p><p>Jeno cracks a smile as he holds the thin paper down by its edges. He tucks the paper away into his pocket, making a mental note to call Donghyuck later, let him know that he came back and that he missed him too.</p><p>“But the new neighbours are nice too. They have a boy your age, and an older son that studies in Seoul,” she remarks as she moves away to rinse the dishes, lathering soap onto the sponge and her hands, “they moved here from China not long after the Lee’s moved out. Lovely family; all very soft-spoken. The son comes over to help me around the house sometimes.”</p><p>Without turning back, she smiles down at her hands and says, “you should go make friends.”</p><p>There’s little for Jeno to lose, and it’s a nice day out – not too hot, nor too cold. So, he decides maybe he will. Later.</p><p>He downs the last of his tea and slides out of his seat, kissing the back of his grandmother’s head before heading back up to the room.</p><p> </p><p>The park across the street, also, is just as Jeno remembers it.</p><p>Upfront, there’s a playground with three sets of slides – the swirly, the tunnel, and the wave, accompanied by a rock-climbing wall and large, round, net swing. He vaguely remembers competing against Jaehyun on who could climb the wall the fastest and running to conquer the swing before his older brother. Alas, Jaehyun’s longer limbs always won, and Jeno sulked until Donghyuck would shine in with his sunny self and they’d wrestle Jaehyun off together. Despite the sunny morning and cool breeze, the scene is barren. Jeno stands alone on the edge of the park wondering why everything feels so forlorn.</p><p>Past the playground, at the end of the open field, is a long line of giant thujas, a little overgrown, a little rough around the edges. They fence a small stream that eventually leads to the lake, which is mostly used by tourists wanting to get a closer look at the mountains. If Jeno remembers correctly, there’s a stone path leading to the other side of the stream, each step spaced out within one easy hop, eventually giving on to a garden of wildflowers. Unwilling to walk to the end, Jeno opts for the brief walk to the garden – shortly finding himself weaving through the evergreen barricade to get to the stream – hoping to find a good space for sunbathing.</p><p>Jeno stops in his tracks, twigs snapping under his feet. Crouched on top of the stone in the middle of the stream is a petite, golden-haired boy, staring into the clear water. He’s got one hand curled on top of his knee, and the other swirling a small twig around in the stream. He doesn’t seem to have noticed Jeno yet, because it’s been about a minute into Jeno’s trance and the boy has yet to acknowledge him staring.</p><p>The water runs smoothly against the rocks, babbling and rippling along with the gentle breeze that pushes it. The constant trickling, the brush of wind against blades of grass, the rustle of leaves, the loud drum of his heart  – like a cacophony right in his ears. Jeno is suddenly hyperaware of every sound around him, and yet, they do not compare to the volume of the stillness that holds within the seconds the stranger blinks. Looks up. Turns.</p><p>It all collapses into silence when their eyes meet. Then, the world resumes its course. </p><p>“Can I help you?” The stranger asks, frowning at Jeno as he rises, perfectly balanced on both feet on the stone.</p><p>The glamour from before had gone as fast as it had come. The boy, Jeno realizes, doesn’t have golden hair and is certainly not a magical creature. But he comes pretty close, he thinks to himself.</p><p>Outwardly, Jeno shakes his head, “No, you’re good. I was just,” he feebly points across the lake, “trying to cross.”</p><p>“Oh,” the boy glances back at the water, lips slightly forming a pout before he looks back at Jeno. “I’ll be out of your way then.”</p><p>He moves to hop back across when Jeno shakes his head.</p><p>“No, please. I can sit here too. It’s fine,” Jeno sits himself down on the grass before the stranger can object, “I don’t really have a reason to cross anyways.”</p><p>Looking unconvinced, the stranger repeats his earlier action – glancing once at the water, then at Jeno, “I’m Renjun.”</p><p>The invitation for an introduction is abrupt and baseless, but Jeno complies anyways.</p><p>
  <em>Make friends.</em>
</p><p>“I’m Jeno.”</p><p>Renjun’s eyes widen momentarily, “Oh, you’re Mrs Lee’s grandson. The city boy.”</p><p>Jeno scrunches his nose, sudden heat rising to his cheeks, “yeah, kinda – I mean, yeah.”</p><p>Renjun nods and resumes perching on top of the stone, swishing the twig around in the water.</p><p>“What’re you doing?” Jeno asks out of curiosity.</p><p>“There are silverfish in the water,” Renjun answers, explaining little to nothing. When Jeno can only reply with a blank stare, he continues, “they like it when I swish this twig around. They come to play, following my movements and leaving a trail of silver in the water at every turn.”</p><p>Jeno’s already on his feet, making his way to the stream to get a visual explanation of Renjun’s actions. Hopping across the stones, he stops on the one beside Renjun and peers down at the water. The smaller male, slightly taken aback by Jeno’s close presence, blinks at him for a moment before going back to his task.</p><p>Sure enough, with every swish of the stick, the silver stripe of tiny fish move with every ripple in the water. Jeno earnestly watches the action, then at the silver gleam reflecting in Renjun’s eyes.</p><p>“Woah,” he marvels under his breath.</p><p>“Right?” Renjun smiles at him, standing upright. He lightly pats Jeno’s shoulder, gesturing for him to hop back across so Renjun can follow.</p><p>“How long are you staying for, Lee Jeno?” Renjun asks as they walk back across the field.</p><p>“The summer. Just until college starts.”</p><p>Renjun hums, “That’s nice. I know Mrs Lee is very happy to have you back. She kept complaining that you and,” he pauses to think, “your brother, had forgotten about her or something.”</p><p>Jeno smiles, “yeah, she’s a bit dramatic, but that’s grandma.”</p><p>They stop at the footpath and Renjun prepares to make a turn, “I have somewhere to be,” he presses his lips firmly together and smiles, kissing his teeth, “I’ll catch you around.”</p><p>“Sure,” Jeno waves as Renjun walks away before heading back inside the house.</p><p>-</p><p>The next time Jeno meets Renjun is two nights later, from his bedroom. To be precise, they’re in their respective rooms and Jeno had unintentionally seen the other when he opened the curtains. It’s become a routine for him to stare out the window before heading to bed every night, the silence of the world calming his mind.</p><p>Tonight, his gaze is on Renjun, who’s got a telescope poking out of the window – angled towards the sky – and his blonde head hiding behind it. Jeno blinks awkwardly at the boy who has yet to notice his presence, eventually clearing his throat gruffly and making Renjun’s small shoulders jump.</p><p>“Oh, hi,” Renjun moves aside and Jeno catches a full view of his appearance. He’s donning dark blue pyjamas that appear two sizes too big – the long sleeves leaving only his fingertips in view. There are printed patterns on them, Jeno realises when he squints – green aliens and silver UFOs scattered randomly.</p><p>“Are you wearing alien pyjamas?”</p><p>Renjun stills, blinking awkwardly, then curls into himself. His fingers grasp onto the cuffs of his sleeves tightly as he wraps his arms around his middle, “maybe – so what?”</p><p>Jeno chuckles, leaning against the windowsill comfortably. “Cute.”</p><p>The sudden red that tinges Renjun’s cheeks makes Jeno chuckle again, while the shy boy puffs out his cheeks. They glow warm in the cool-toned night, and the familiar flutter in Jeno’s heart returns. He clears his throat.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Jeno changes the subject, giving Renjun a chance to collect himself.</p><p>“With this?” Renjun smooths his hand over the body of the telescope, “I’m stargazing.” He says matter-of-factly.</p><p>“Cool,” Jeno nods, clearing his throat to dispel the growing awkward lump.</p><p>The conversation stops there and they lapse into a comfortable silence. Jeno leans against the frame on his knees and Renjun disappears behind the telescope again. Once his knees begin to hurt, Jeno leaves to fetch a stool before leaning back against the window frame. He rests his chin on his forearms, watching Renjun’s nimble fingers slowly work the magnifier beside the peepholes.</p><p>“Do you do this every night?”</p><p>Renjun looks up, slightly flustered when he sees Jeno staring right at him. “Uhh, yeah, I guess.”</p><p>Jeno smiles, tilting his head and resting his cheek on his arm. He takes delight in how easily flustered Renjun gets. “You’re so red. I’m only talking to you, why are you so shy, Renjun?”</p><p>The frazzled boy shrinks into the darkness of his room, the glow of the sky barely illuminating him through the window. Renjun tucks his fingers behind his ear and mumbles, almost inaudibly, “because, you’re just staring.”</p><p>“Oh,” Jeno straightens and diverts his eyes away from Renjun’s face, “sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”</p><p>Renjun shakes his head and reassures Jeno that it’s okay, but for the rest of the night, Jeno makes sure to not stare no matter the urge.</p><p>“What do you do every night just staring up there – look for aliens?” Jeno asks teasingly when the silence settles over them again.</p><p>Renjun gives him a wary look. “Why do you ask?”</p><p>“Oh, I don’t know. It’s just – your outfit I guess?”</p><p>Renjun wraps an arm protectively around his middle again, without giving Jeno an answer. Instead, the warm glow on his cheeks returns as he glares at the telescope, blush steadily reaching his ears.</p><p>“Oh my God,” Jeno breathes out, “you are!” He throws his head back and laughs, causing Renjun’s blush to furiously spread down his neck. The smaller boy lighting up like a flare in the darkness.</p><p>“What?! You think I’m crazy, don’t you?” Renjun sneers, crossing his arms. His frustration does little to quell the raging blush topping his cheeks.</p><p>“I mean – aliens? Come on, you can’t be serious!<em>”</em></p><p>“And you know of every single thing that exists outside of this planet’s immediate borders, do you?”</p><p>Jeno chuckles awkwardly, the other male’s discerning gaze making his stomach sit as heavy as rocks. “…no?”</p><p>“Then?” Renjun huffs and turns his cheek, “here I thought I’d go over and keep your lonely ass company.”</p><p>Jeno immediately stops laughing, “Hey, I’m not lonely!”</p><p>“Your grandma tells me otherwise.”</p><p>
  <em>Can’t trust grandma to guard my dignity then.</em>
</p><p>With a wry smile, Renjun disappears behind the telescope again, leaving only the red tips of his ears visible. Meanwhile, Jeno lets the comfortable hush rest as he joins Renjun in gazing up at the stars with his naked eye. The night sky resembles a child’s craftwork; spilt glitter on a dark canvas, with a big dollop of off-white paint in the corner. It fills him with the nostalgia of a place he once knew. But now, with seemingly negligible changes, he barely knows at all.</p><p>Jeno blinks away from the starry void to look at Renjun, finding the latter mirroring Jeno’s position, gaze lost in the flurry of sparks above.</p><p>“You should come over still.”</p><p>Renjun’s focus turns to Jeno as he blinks in surprise.</p><p>“You said you’d come over, and I think you should still do that,” Jeno explains, reminding Renjun of his previous words. “Maybe you can convince me of your… aliens.”</p><p>Renjun judges him for a while, trying to decipher Jeno’s true intentions. If he was just mocking him again. Deeming his request genuine, Renjun gives him a small smile, “Okay,” he says, rubbing his nose on his sleeve which he pulls around his clenched hand, “I will.”</p><p>With one last smile, Jeno bids Renjun good night and retreats into the duvet; leaving the window open.</p><p>-</p><p>When Jeno comes down for breakfast the next morning, the first person he sees is his grandma – naturally – and Renjun. The two have their backs turned towards him as they crowd around the sink and stove, the space too small even for their tiny frames. There’s a strand of blonde hair standing upright in the middle of Renjun’s head, bouncing as he moves and turns. Jeno crosses the short distance and smooths it down.</p><p>“Oh, good morning!” Renjun angles his head back and smiles, “you’re up,” he turns to the digital clock on the microwave, then back at Jeno, “late.”</p><p>It’s 10 in the morning.</p><p>“That’s very late,” Renjun comments when Jeno tries to defend himself.</p><p>Jeno ignores him and peers over at the counter. His grandma is pan-frying tofu, while Renjun snips seaweed paper into strips. He steals a piece for himself, the snack tacky on his tongue.</p><p>“When I asked you to come over, I didn’t think it’d be so soon,” Jeno says once his grandma shoos them away to <em>go play.</em></p><p>“Your grandma called me over in the morning,” Renjun flops onto the couch, pulling out a backpack from behind it. “Also, I wanted to show you something.”</p><p>“Ooooh, is it proof of your aliens?”</p><p>Renjun shoots him a glare over his shoulder as he takes a large, blue book out from his bag and places it on the coffee table, then goes to sit in front of it. Jeno, amused, goes to sit beside him. The front cover of the book has two shadowy figures and a telescope, with a bright backdrop of the galaxy behind them. There are constellations mapped out on the stars and planets in orbit.</p><p>“I saw you looking out the window every night since you came, and thought you’d be interested in something like this,” Renjun explains nonchalantly, flipping open the book to pages of the night sky. Then he adds with a stern look, “<em>not</em> about aliens… yet.”</p><p>“And you didn’t come out to say hello?” Jeno teases, angling his head to catch Renjun’s gaze. The smaller male reddens and carries on, carefully flipping through the pages.</p><p>He lands on a double-page spread of a burst of stars – a perfect replica of the previous night. Renjun points to a little zoomed-in section is a gathering of stars bigger and brighter than the rest, with annotations and arrows labelling each section of the sky, offering chemical and mathematical explanations that Jeno’s ‘summer-holiday’ brain can’t comprehend.</p><p>“This is what I saw last night,” Renjun pushes the book towards Jeno, “an open cluster. It’s thousands of stars born from the same molecular cloud.”</p><p>Jeno marvels at the image, utterly speechless at the magnificence on the page. He can’t even imagine what it looks like through a telescope. It’s no surprise Renjun is into this stuff.</p><p>“Stunning, isn’t it?”</p><p>Jeno nods dumbly, and a proud Renjun begins narrating the story of how an open cluster forms, the history of clusters, and the most famous ones – with his very own photo evidence.</p><p>“How did you even capture these?” Jeno asks, flipping through the printed photos of clusters, nebulae, and constellations.</p><p>“There’s a snapshot function on my telescope. My brother splurged on it, hoping it’d inspire me to take cosmology like he does in the city.”</p><p>“And did it?” Jeno asks, even though he doubts the Renjun isn’t inspired after witnessing <em>this.</em></p><p>“A little,” Renjun says, “I love the cosmos, but the science can be a little tricky.” He smiles secretly to himself, a twinkle in his eye, “ and it's not nearly as romantic when there are chemical formulas and physics involved.”</p><p>Somehow that’s exactly the kind of response Jeno had expected of the other boy. He laughs, and tells him so, making Renjun roll his eyes.</p><p>“What I mean is,” Renjun sighs as he tries to defend himself, “the science is not as <em>pretty </em>as just looking at space.”</p><p>“Okay, I get that.” Jeno reaches out to push Renjun hair out of his eyes, and Renjun follows suit, combing his hair back with his fingers. Curling up his hand and bringing it back down to his lap, Jeno leans on his hand and says, “show me more of your pretty space pictures then.”</p><p>With a barely audible squeal and wide smile, Renjun brings the book between their laps, shuffling closer so his knee balances on top of Jeno’s.</p><p>“So, let me show you my favourite constellations – oh! I have some more pictures too!”</p><p>Jeno simply smiles and nods, letting Renjun talk the afternoon away.</p><p> </p><p>“Renjun is nice, isn’t he?” Jeno’s grandmother says as she pours seaweed soup into a bowl, placing it before Jeno.</p><p>“He is,” Jeno shoves a spoonful of rice into his mouth, “can talk a lot though.”</p><p>His grandmother laughs, her tired cheeks plumping around the wrinkles of her eyes, “you can never be bored with him. Always has something to say, some elaborate story to tell,” she taps the side of her head, “listen well, Jeno.”</p><p>The front door shuts and dinner is briefly interrupted by the arrival of his grandfather. He soon joins them at the table as Jeno helps prepare his plate.</p><p>“Tell me, boy, how was your day?”</p><p>“Renjun came over,” his grandmother interjects, proudly.</p><p>“He did? Ah, so Jeno made a friend,” his grandfather makes a satisfied face as he looks at Jeno, “I was worried you’d be bored and alone.”</p><p>Jeno playfully rolls his eyes and denies being bored, saying that their company is enough. “But,” he adds, “Renjun isn’t bad either.”</p><p>His eyes flicker to his fingertips as he rubs the pads together. The silky touch of Renjun’s hair lingers. Jeno rubs them on his jeans.</p><p>“I heard from your dad that college will start soon,” his grandfather changes the topic swiftly, “so what field are you pursuing? Business, like your father, I presume?”</p><p>Jeno gives him the same answer he’d given his parents, his brother, and his careers advisor last year – a solemn shake of his head, “I don’t know for sure. Just taking a core course.”</p><p>“Oh, no matter. You’re a smart boy! It’ll come to you.”</p><p>Though Jeno knows his grandfather means well, the room is suddenly stifling. He gulps down his soup and excuses himself, claiming drowsiness, he retreats upstairs.</p><p>The window is still open from the previous night. Wanting fresh air, Jeno sticks his head out and inhales deeply, closing his eyes. When he opens them again, the sight of the sleeping town fills his mind and he’s filled with peace. If he tries hard enough, he can make out the bright lights beyond the mountain, where his dream ends, and reality begins. Jeno turns away, shutting the window and throwing himself face-first onto the bed.</p><p>-</p><p>The sun burns like a bitch on bare skin – is what Jeno thinks the first ten minutes into sitting by the stream, watching Renjun go at it with his fish friends again. Jeno reaches out and dips his hands in the water, then rubs the cool liquid over his scorched legs.</p><p>“I told you to wear sunscreen.” Renjun chides, facing Jeno with one hand on his hips, and the other wagging the stick at him. The Chinese male has white stripes of sun lotion on his nose, cheeks, and forehead; hair clipped back with a bow pin. His legs and arms are pale with zinc-oxide. Clad in shorts that reach mid-thigh, and an oversized white graphic t-shirt that says <em>‘reach for the stars’</em>, Jeno thinks Renjun looks stupidly adorable.</p><p>“You look ridiculous,” Jeno comments, squinting at the blonde boy. He’s too bright under the sunlight, and his white-cast limbs don’t help at all.</p><p>Renjun sticks out his tongue, “at least I won’t look like a sundried tomato by the time we head back!”</p><p>Jeno laughs, springing to his feet and hopping over the stones to collide straight into Renjun. The latter shrieks as Jeno bumps him, causing him to lose his footing and topple into the water. He sits chest-deep in the stream, shocked to stillness as Jeno cackles above him, then finally jump in after.</p><p>“Now I have to re-apply!” Renjun whines, shoving Jeno’s chest, “I’m not trying to shrivel up twenty years early!”</p><p>“You can be closer to your fish friends now,” Jeno beams at him innocently. Renjun closes his eyes.</p><p>“You’re so annoying.”</p><p>The silverfish swim between the gaps between their legs, disappearing down the stream. The push of the water makes Renjun’s shorts ride up his thighs, revealing smooth skin. Jeno’s neck crawls with heat.</p><p>With much effort he lifts himself out of the water, pants heavy on his hips and shirt plastered to his back. He helps Renjun up as well, letting the thin boy cling to his shoulders as he regains balance.</p><p>Renjun curses under his breath, wringing the end of his shirt dry and pulling down his shorts. Once Renjun has fixed himself, he takes Jeno’s hand and leads him back across to the other side.</p><p>Renjun nods in understanding, taking Jeno’s hand in his and leading him back across, “come on, I have sandwiches and red licorice in my bag. We can eat and dry ourselves in the sun.”</p><p>They lay down on the field by the playground. Renjun sets out a little make-shift picnic with a bedsheet, and they anchor it in place with their shoes.</p><p>Once Jeno’s done shaking himself as dry as possible, he settles down next to Renjun as the latter pulls the sunscreen out of his backpack. He then reaches over and smears cream over Jeno’s face.</p><p>“Hey!” Jeno gawks, squirming as Renjun rubs the cream onto his face squeezing his cheeks and rubbing his nose.</p><p>“You’re gonna burn, and then that handsome face will be ruined. Nobody wants that.”</p><p>Sitting up immediately, Jeno grabs Renjun’s wrist and yanks him closer, smiling playfully, “you think I’m handsome?”</p><p>Renjun glares at him, unamused, “you think there’s a person who doesn’t? It’s a basic consensus that you’re good looking.”</p><p>“Between who?”</p><p>“Everyone! Your grandparents, my parents just today in the morning when you came to pick me up.”</p><p>Jeno makes a face, urging Renjun to go on.</p><p>“That’s all I know but I’m sure –“</p><p>“Do you think so?” Jeno cuts him off, catching Renjun’s gaze and locking on.</p><p>Renjun swallows, “y-yeah I guess so. I mean, does it matter what I think? You’re still handsome, no matter my opinion.”</p><p>“But, do you think so?” Jeno asks again, hands gripping onto Renjun’s wrists, “out of your own accord, not anyone else’s.”</p><p>They’re leaning into each other, and it’s far too hot to be breathing within such proximity.</p><p>“Yeah,” Renjun ends up mumbling, colour spreading to the tips of his ears.</p><p>Triumphant, Jeno lets Renjun go and pushes himself away. “good. I’m glad you think so,” he beams, and Renjun has to turn away.</p><p>Getting to his feet, Renjun dusts off his pants and reels a chipper Jeno up, “that was so pointless.”</p><p>“Not to me,” Jeno throws an arm casually over Renjun’s shoulder, “getting you to admit that you think that I’m handsome made me feel better.”</p><p>“Whatever,” Renjun rolls his eyes and hands Jeno a sandwich.</p><p>“So, how’s your search going for your alien friends?” Jeno asks playfully.</p><p>Renjun gives him a dry look, but quickly goes on to tell Jeno about his search anyway. “Last night, I thought I got a message on my transmitter.”</p><p>Jeno nearly chokes on his food, “you have a transmitter?!”</p><p>Renjun gives him a look as if the answer is obvious and Jeno is the crazy one here for not knowing so.</p><p>“Well, duh?! You <em>have</em> to have some sort of device for communication. You can’t entirely rely on galactical signs.</p><p>“Right.” Jeno nods, “of course not. And then? What – your message was just interruption from a local radio station?”</p><p>“No. At least, I don’t think so. The pattern was just not like the usual messages. So, I ruled it out.”</p><p>“And you say ‘<em>usual’ </em>because you always get messages from your alien friends?”</p><p>Renjun scrunches his nose, lips forming a slight pout as he grumbles, “you’re making fun of me again.”</p><p>“No! No – I promise I’m not,” Jeno offers, but the laughter that slips through his words aren’t very convincing.</p><p>Renjun, therefore, only glares at him harder, “I’ll prove it to you next time! There’s a lot of research gone into this you know – it’s not just me! Many people have argued for and have proof of life forms in outer space!”</p><p>“Okay, okay,” Jeno laughs, Renjun’s sudden outburst making him endearingly adorable, “I believe you!”</p><p>Renjun groans and jumps to his feet, “I’m going on the swings. When you’re done making fun of me, maybe you can join me.” And with that, he runs off towards the playground.</p><p>-</p><p>“This is impossible! We’ll be here for hours!”</p><p>Jeno’s grandfather looks over from his makeshift seat made of a wooden crate and tuts.</p><p>“Patience, son, they’ll bite eventually.”</p><p>Jeno lets his head fall back and sighs. Beside him, Renjun’s sitting cross-legged on a large rock by the bucket of bait and making a disgusted face as the worms squirm over each other.</p><p>“Remind me why you asked me to come again?” He asks, nose scrunching further.</p><p>“Because if I had to go through this alone,” Jeno looks over to his grandfather, making sure he’s out of earshot, “I’d lose my mind.” </p><p>Just a few minutes past first light, Jeno had been awoken by his grandfather and handed a fishing rod with a late notice that they were leaving for the lake. Groaning awake, Jeno had lugged on his clothes before meeting with his grandfather outside. He’d gotten the idea to drag Renjun along just as they were driving out, jumping out of the car to barge into Renjun’s home (politely, of course, Renjun’s mother was there)  and drag the sleepy boy out without warning.</p><p>“Remind me why I let you drag me out without even answering your request?” Renjun asks as he stands to his feet, dusting off his calves.</p><p>Jeno turns and gives him the most charming smile he can conjure, batting his eyelashes dramatically for good measure, “because you love spending time with me.”</p><p>To that, Renjun doesn’t reply, merely scoffs and shoves Jeno’s shoulder with his own.</p><p>What feels like hours later, but is, in fact, twenty minutes, Jeno feels a tug on his line.</p><p>“Oh, my God.”</p><p>Renjun drops the shiny pebble he holds and down with it goes the tiny rock tower he made as he rushes over to Jeno.</p><p>“What’s wrong?”</p><p>Jeno’s grip around his rod tightens as the pull towards the water gets stronger. Renjun catches on, immediately grabbing Jeno’s arm with one hand and furiously winding back the reel with the other.</p><p>“Grandad! Jeno’s caught something!” Renjun shouts as he and Jeno struggle with the rod. Jeno’s grandfather jumps to his feet, rushing over to help the boys reel the catch in.</p><p>“Steady boys. That’s it, now, PULL!”</p><p>The two boys follow his commands as the old man winds back the reel. With one final pull, the line is flying out of the water, a large fish flapping in the air at the end of the line.</p><p>“Woah!” Renjun steps back as they bring the catch closer, “Jeno, what the hell?”</p><p>Jeno simply gapes, dumbfounded at his luck. His grandfather claps him hard on the back and congratulates him. Once they’ve placed it inside the crate, Renjun prods its skin with a gloved finger, then grimaces.</p><p>“It’s so ugly,” he pokes it again, “look at its lips.”</p><p>“Go on,” Jeno crouches down and lifts the fish to Renjun’s face, “give it a kiss.”</p><p>Renjun gags, shoving the offensive creature away; to no avail, as Jeno follows Renjun up and proceeds to chase him around the lake. Once Jeno’s decided he’s had enough of tormenting Renjun – and enduring his screaming – he heads back just in time for his grandfather to announce that they’re heading home.</p><p>“Renjun,” the old man calls as the small boy warily returns to Jeno’s side, eyeing the way Jeno puts the fish back into the crate. “Join us for lunch?”</p><p> </p><p>It’s late into the night, and Jeno’s watching out of the window at Renjun fumble around in his room after promising to return with <em>something</em>, to quote. The Chinese male has been rummaging around for a good ten minutes now, and just as Jeno’s about to sigh for the umpteenth time, Renjun reappears.</p><p>“You’re kidding me,” Jeno exhales, stifling a laugh.</p><p>In Renjun’s hands are two paper cups, decorated with washi-tape, connected by its end with a long piece of string.</p><p>“We can hear each other better, and we won’t have to whisper as much,” is the justification Renjun offers, before throwing one end over straight into Jeno’s outstretched hands.</p><p>Jeno’s name is printed neatly under the rim, complete with an orange heart at the end. He looks up at Renjun, chest filling with warmth, and smiles. Renjun brings the cup to his mouth, prompting Jeno to bring his cup to his ear.</p><p>“This is much better. It’ll be like we’re speaking into each other’s ears.” Renjun grins, and Jeno follows along.</p><p>“Renjun, have I ever told you how adorable you are?”</p><p>At that, the familiar flush from their initial nightly encounter makes another appearance upon the apples of Renjun’s cheeks, dusting them pretty and pink.</p><p>“Stop it,” Renjun whines, pointlessly hiding his face behind his cup.</p><p>“Okay, okay,” Jeno looks up at the night sky, then faces Renjun again to find the latter staring back. “Not searching the stars tonight?”</p><p>“Yes,” Renjun says before dropping the cup to rush into his room, hauling his telescope back, “of course I am. My duty never stops.”</p><p>Jeno’s body relaxes over the windowsill, an arm hanging over the frame. He watches Renjun fiddle with his telescope. “Have you seen anything yet in all your times searching?”</p><p>Renjun shakes his head then disappears behind the telescope.</p><p>“Then how can you be so sure?”</p><p>This regains Renjun’s attention, and the small boy reappears, presses the cup to his mouth, and whispers, “I’m not, but holding on to this reminds me that there is something more outside of this small town.”</p><p>He looks around at the mountains, shrouded in darkness, then back at Jeno, who hasn’t stopped staring at him since.</p><p>“Isn’t it so fascinating and wondrous to think that…” Renjun’s gaze flits up to the sky, “there’s so much more out there.”</p><p>“Makes me feel kind of small actually,” Jeno mumbles into his cup.</p><p>“Well, I guess so. But it’s about perspective. While thinking about how big the world is <em>does</em> make me feel kind of small, it also fills me with this hope and wonder that keeps me going.” He meets Jeno’s gaze, “Am I making sense?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Jeno says, a little breathless when Renjun smiles and shies away behind his telescope again. But Jeno doesn’t look to the sky like Renjun does; as he, himself, does on most nights. He doesn’t look away from Renjun.</p><p>In the silent stretch between dusk and dawn, beneath the twinkling eyes of infinity, Jeno quietly falls in love with a boy who’s had his heart stolen by planets and people that aren’t his own.</p><p>-</p><p>Reaching epiphany enlightens Jeno of sensations and quirks that were always present yet went missed by him. Like his grandmother’s knowing gaze when Jeno yawns into his rice bowl the next morning, and his grandfather’s suggestion of bringing Renjun with them to the farmer’s market later that afternoon; smiling as Jeno rubs his eyes and nods wordlessly.</p><p>Like the rush in his chest when Renjun arrives at their doorstep just minutes after breakfast, in an obscene, canary raincoat and pink bucket-hat. Despite the obnoxious colour, Renjun shines like the sun, and Jeno’s mind goes into orbit.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” He asks, eyes squinted at the sight.</p><p>“We’re going out.”</p><p>“We are?”</p><p>Jeno ignores his grandmother’s hissed <em>‘I knew it’ </em>from the couch as Renjun grabs him by the fingers and yanks him out the door – Jeno, barely managing to grab his shoes.</p><p>They arrive at the bus stop the next street over. Renjun hands Jeno a bottle of ginger beer and red licorice as they wait for the bus. The gaseous drink bubbles in Jeno’s stomach; the sugar clings to his teeth.</p><p>“Where are we going?” Jeno asks. Renjun bounces on the balls of his feet, sucking on the end of the lolly that’s trapped between his fingers like a cigarette.</p><p>“It’s a surprise.”</p><p>Jeno sighs, collapsing on the bench, “I knew it. You’re an alien, and now you're kidnapping me.”</p><p>“Haha. Very funny,” Renjun rolls his eyes and pushes the candy past his lips, unaware of what he’s doing to Jeno as the red sweet disappears between his glossy lips. Jeno shakes his head, clearing his throat.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck epiphanies.</em>
</p><p>“Why won’t you tell me where we’re going!” He whines, grabbing Renjun’s hand and swinging his arm around.</p><p>“Patience. Just, trust me. You’ll love it.”</p><p>The bus arrives minutes later. Jeno follows Renjun inside, their hands still linked as they make their way towards the back of the bus. It’s a slow start to the morning as the two remain the only passenger for quite a few stops until an old man hobbles on, only to get off at the next stop by the newsagency. Then, they are alone once more.</p><p>Unlatching and locking their fingers repeatedly, Jeno looks to Renjun in hopes that the boy will look back, surrender to Jeno’s probing curiosity, and tell him where they are headed. To no avail, Renjun simply lets Jeno play with his fingers, bottom lip casually caught between his teeth as he watches the town pass by.</p><p>“Last stop boys.” The driver yells back as the bus screeches to a halt. Renjun pulls Jeno along, thanking the driver as he pays their fare.</p><p>“H-hey, what’re you doing?” Jeno asks once Renjun’s handed the money over.</p><p>The smaller male frowns up at him, “paying, Jeno. What else does it look like?”</p><p>He pushes the stammering boy off the bus, backpack clasped tightly around his chest and stomach as he jumps off the high step.</p><p>“You should’ve let me pay for mine.”</p><p>Renjun shrugs, “doesn’t matter, it’s not much.”</p><p>Jeno sighs and drops the matter, knowing well that Renjun wouldn’t care no matter what he did. Instead, he finally notes their surroundings – bare landscape bordering just outside the valleys with some vegetation scattered idly around the grasslands, and a single hut just beside the bus stop. Jeno shields his eyes from the sun as he looks back to where they came from. There isn’t another sign of human life for a few miles, and the only sign of the town is a dark smudge in the far distance.</p><p>“Where are we?” Jeno breathes out, turning in his spot, searching from side to side for any indication of their whereabouts.</p><p>“You’ll see, you’ll see,” Renjun repeats with slight annoyance, dragging Jeno along the gravel path away from the bus stop and further away from civilization.</p><p>In the heat, a short twenty-minute walk weighs like twenty hours, and it’s after Jeno’s sixth whine of complaint does Renjun stop in his tracks. Jeno, who drags his feet along the ground, bumps into him.</p><p>“Look,” Renjun tells him, and Jeno lifts his gaze and follows along where he points.</p><p>For a split second, Jeno’s breathing stops.</p><p>They stand before an expansive sunflower field stretching as far as the eye can see. The tall, yellow sundials knock together and sway with the gentle breeze in a mesmerizing dance of sorts, whilst gazing up at the glorious sun and soaking in her warm light.</p><p>“Renjun…” is all Jeno can breathe out amidst the stunned silence in his brain.</p><p>The burst of yellow before his eyes seeps in through his nerves, filling every inch of his body with sunshine. It’s so overwhelmingly breathtaking, Jeno thinks he’ll burst any minute.</p><p>Beside him, Renjun raises a brow, cocky and proud as he side-eyes him, “let’s go.”</p><p>He takes Jeno’s hand, linking their fingers together, and leads him down the narrow track leading down the meadow. Up close, the sunflowers reach to Jeno’s earlobe. Dancing in the wind, their large heads, roughly the size of his open palm, lean across to kiss the air above his skin.</p><p>“There was a blight here last year,” Renjun tells him as they continue down the path. The flowers omnipresent and listening to the whisper of Renjun’s words, turning towards them as they walk down, down, “all the vegetation died and old man Park was devastated. His family suffered greatly.”</p><p>He points ahead and Jeno has to crane his neck to see the house on the outskirts of the meadow. He continues, “Old man Park doesn’t really interact with the fellows in town, but his grandson went to my school and came crying in crying one day about what happened. The news got out fast and everyone rushed over to help.”</p><p>Jeno imagines it as Renjun tells the story. He imagines the community banding together, heartfelt wishes rolling off their tongues along with donations of fresh food and vegetation from their farms. His heart warms.</p><p>“We did what we could, but the blight ruined the soil and nothing would grow here anymore. Everything he planted kept dying.”</p><p>Too busy focused on the way Renjun seems to blend in with the flowers, Jeno doesn’t notice a protruding twig until it pokes into the side of his foot. He hisses, making Renjun whip around instantly.</p><p>“You should’ve worn something more covered,” Renjun chides him softly, and he bends down to remove the twig before Jeno can stop him.</p><p>Jeno looks to Renjun’s feet, at the insanely yellow gumboots, “it’s so hot, and you didn’t tell me where we were going! Had I known…”</p><p>He trails off when Renjun lifts his eyes at him, big, round, and burning gold under the sunlight. Heat crawls up Jeno’s skin and settles across his cheeks.</p><p>“Never mind,” he urges, casting his eyes away, “and then what happened?”</p><p>Remembering the story he was telling, Renjun turns back around and continues leading Jeno through the flowers, “oddly, the only plants that survived the blight were two sunflowers that idly grew amongst the vegetation. So, old man Park got a grant to switch his farm over to the other side and kept this space for the sunflowers. He got a lot of tourists here when the flowers first grew so big, but you know how some of them can be.”</p><p>Renjun looks back with a half-frown and he doesn’t have to explain for Jeno to know.</p><p>“So now he doesn’t let anyone in other than the locals and his family. I like to come here sometimes, so I wanted to show you.”</p><p>They finally stop at what appears to be the heart of the field, at a small patch of open space surrounded by the tall, golden flowers, enclosing them with a little privacy. In here, it feels as if the world has stilled save for the flutter of the petals as the wind brushes against them. In here, it feels as if Jeno’s miles and miles away, with only a thousand eternal sunrises and Renjun, brighter than the sun itself, to accompany him.</p><p>Renjun fixes his hat, screwing it on tighter lest the quickening wind blows it away, and takes off his backpack. It lands on the ground with a heavy thud, crunching the dry grass beneath it. From inside, he takes out a bedsheet and Jeno helps him spread it out on the ground.</p><p>“Tell me about where you’re from, Jeno Lee,” Renjun says, cheek pressed against his arms as he lays on his stomach. His raincoat lays crumpled beside him as the day’s temperature climbs steadily – why he even wore it is a mystery not much unlike himself – and his pink hat sits loosely on top of his head.</p><p>There is little shade in the middle of the field under the open sky, but the outstretched heads of the sunflowers provide some salvation against the sun’s excruciating, merciless rays.</p><p>“What do you want to know?” Jeno asks after a beat, facing Renjun with a soft smile. His lips are red from the liquorice they had earlier. Jeno wants to kiss him, taste the cherry on his lips.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck epiphanies. Fuck feelings.</em>
</p><p>Renjun shrugs, “I don’t know. Tell me about your home, your school. What does your sky look like? How are the flowers there?”</p><p>“We don’t have a lot of flowers,” Jeno says briskly with a scrunch of his nose. It tickles, as the sunflower above his head sways to let the sunshine directly on his face. He wriggles it and shields his face with his hand.</p><p>“We only have flowers if people plant them in their balconies or front yards, but front yards are small so still not as many flowers. We have them at parks, though,” he adds, so as not to sound too depressing, “we have parks just for flowers.”</p><p>“Hmm,” Renjun blinks slowly, his lashes glinting gold under the sunlight, “and what about your home? What does it feel like? What’re the people like over there?”</p><p>Jeno recalls his grandmother telling him that Renjun’s curiosity with the outside world stems from his love for reading, and the fact that he’s lived in small towns his whole life. He’s never seen the city, never felt the coldness of the concrete jungle where the sun doesn’t shine – not like here, at least. He knows no chilling cold, no empty skies, no grey. Only knows warmth, stars, and yellow.</p><p>“Home is an apartment building close to the business district,” Jeno explains briefly, “I have my parents when they’re not at work. I have my brother when he’s visiting from college. I have my cats, my video games. I have two friends who live close by. They come over sometimes. I go over sometimes. It’s nice.”</p><p>“You don’t sound very happy about it though,” Renjun comments, catching the undercurrent of displeasure in Jeno’s tone that he’s trying to hide.</p><p>“It’s just, very lonely at times,” Jeno confesses with an exhale, rolling onto his side, “it’s very fast-paced over there, everyone’s always busy, running around. A lot of noise, pollution, traffic. You don’t get much time to think because there’s never enough time. There,” he sighs heavily, “there’s almost no time to breathe, you’re either wasting time or taking up someone else’s time, and time is money. There are no stars either.”</p><p>Renjun gasps so sharply Jeno was afraid he’d choke on air, “no stars?! Then – then – what do you do?! What?!”</p><p>“No, no, there are, sometimes! There’s just a lot of light at night, so…” he trails off, feeling guilty for dampening Renjun’s expectations. He doesn’t mean to sound pessimistic. He’s just being honest.</p><p>“That’s horrible! Then, what is there?”</p><p>So, Jeno tells him about the night scene, about markets and food stalls and laughter shared with friends over sweet treats and spicy snacks. He tells him about the beach, how weirdly nice wet sand feels under the feet, and how waves crashing onto the shore is one of the best sounds to ever hear.</p><p>He tells him about museums and galleries, about planetariums that bring the night sky within arm’s reach. About enormous libraries and how calming they are, to arcades and how exhilarating they can be.</p><p>“There are good bits – if you don’t get so caught up in the intense pace of things and stop to look around, and you know where to look.”</p><p>“But?”</p><p>Jeno smiles at him, “but, when you live there you can’t help but get caught up. Suddenly, you’re also one of the people rushing around with no time to breathe, crushed by the pressure of expectation and making your time and presence valuable. The beach and markets and arcades are there, but it’s not like you can go every day or whenever you want. And things get boring after a while.”</p><p>“Well, that’s the same here!” Renjun inches a little closer, rubs the tip of his nose, “after a while, things get repetitive. Same faces, same park, same stores, same library!” He sticks up one finger, “one, small library.”</p><p>“But you have the stars.”</p><p>“Yeah – and thank God! I don’t hate it here either, I love my family and friends and flowers but – things get lonely here too, you know. That’s why it helps to believe that out there,” Renjun stretches a hand out to the sky, “there’s something more, something fantastical, something interesting!”</p><p>The excitement in his voice makes Jeno’s heart swell. For a boy to be filled with so much wonder, Jeno can only hope the light in his eyes never die.</p><p>“It’s all about perspective,” Renjun concludes.</p><p>While Jeno’s never thought of it that way, he doesn’t dismiss it. There’s truth to Renjun’s words and he knows so, but he can’t help but feel that with Renjun, the world becomes a little bearable. A little prettier.</p><p>Maybe it’s experience, perspective. But maybe, it’s also about the people you see it with.</p><p>He’d like to see the world through Renjun’s eyes, bright and optimistic and hopeful. He’d like to see the world, here and back in Seoul and more, with Renjun.</p><p>“How about college?” Renjun asks, eyes shining, “are you excited?”</p><p>“Not so much excited as nervous,” Jeno laughs half-heartedly. He grits his teeth at the thought of the upcoming months.</p><p>Renjun hums, flopping onto his back, gazing up at the cloud, “I’d like to go to college one day. I’d study cosmology, or philosophy, or art, or mythology, or history!” Jeno stifles a chuckle. Renjun turns to him with bright eyes, “what’re you gonna study?”</p><p>“I haven’t decided yet.” Jeno admits, “I’ll take a core course as I think about it.”</p><p>“Oh, okay! We, umm, don’t really have a college here so I can’t do anything about it unless I wanna move to the city – which – I don’t know… but they’re building a community college soon – one day. So maybe, once that’s done…”</p><p>He trails off, and Jeno can tell without Renjun explaining that he’s thinking about when and if the college will ever be built in time. There’s only so much drive, passion, and wonder in one person and most of it is confined to their youth. Even someone as optimistic as Renjun must know that his youthful days are numbered. Before responsibility eventually takes over.</p><p>“I’ll take you,” Jeno hears himself say before he can stop himself – before he can even think about the gravity of his words.</p><p>
  <em>What’s he saying? Take Renjun to the city? Take Renjun away from his family? What will he even do? Renjun only deserves the best – can Jeno even give him that? He doesn’t want to go back himself! Isn’t that just selfish? Isn’t he only saying it because he wants Renjun to himself? How –</em>
</p><p>Fortunately for him, Renjun doesn’t seem to take his words seriously even though they came from Jeno’s heart, unfiltered by his brain.</p><p>“I might have to think about it,” he says with a light laugh, “but, the thought is appreciated.”</p><p>Jeno doesn’t say more, but his heart speaks loudly in his chest. Every thump meaning, <em>I’m serious, I’ll take you. I’ll take you anywhere you want to go if it means you’ll be with me.</em></p><p>After a while of mindless chatter, they sit up to eat the packed lunch Renjun brought along. Sandwiches and berries.</p><p>Renjun takes a bite out of a particularly large cherry and the juice bursts over his mouth, staining his lips red and dribbling down his chin.</p><p>“Oh my God,” Renjun hurriedly wipes his chin before the red can drip onto his t-shirt.</p><p>Jeno, having prepared no tissues or anything, reaches out to wipe the corner of Renjun’s mouth.</p><p>The action is instinctive, and a reaction to how Jeno’s mind goes on overdrive when he sees the way Renjun’s already red and pouty lips become even redder. And he wants to kiss him so badly.</p><p>
  <em>So badly.</em>
</p><p>He distracts himself, tearing his eyes away from Renjun’s lips to wipe his thumb on the grass. The juice stains his skin a light purple.</p><p>The next cherry Renjun pops into his mouth he eats whole, to avoid the earlier mess, spitting the pip out onto his hand.</p><p>Heat spikes up Jeno’s chest, neck, and cheeks as he stares – <em>can’t stop staring</em> – at the way Renjun’s lips curl and look so, so sweet. It doesn’t help that Renjun is cute as a button, pretty as a flower, and as wonderful as the stars.</p><p>He wants Renjun to look at him with the same wonder and affection he looks at silverfish and distant suns with. He wants Renjun to curl against him, wants to hold him, listen to him speak about his curiosities and dreams and crazy galactic theories forever. He wants to hear him laugh close to his ear, the beautiful melody resonating down to Jeno’s heart.</p><p>They’re only sitting in a field of sunflowers eating snacks and talking. Yet somehow, it’s the tranquillity of the moment, the warmth of the sun on his skin, the momentary privacy of them hidden between the mercies of the sunflowers, which have turned to face the sun. Almost as if shying away from the coming intimacy.</p><p>So, Jeno, without thinking – which is something he’s been doing a lot around Renjun, in a moment of bravery, hears himself say, “Renjun.”</p><p>The boy lifts his eyes, raspberry trapped between his lips. The firmness of Jeno’s tone reflects in the confusion pinching his brows.</p><p>“Hmm?” He swallows the fruit, and when Jeno only stares with parted lips, his cheeks colour prettily and he curls into himself, “what is it? Just say it!”</p><p>“Can I kiss you?” Jeno blurts out, and the weight of his words only hit him when Renjun’s light flush turns into a <em>furious </em>red that spreads down to his neck. Jeno blushes too, bowing his head, glaring holes into the cream-coloured sheet beneath them.</p><p>“Okay,” Renjun meekly whispers, legs crossed and hands gripping onto his ankles tightly. He doesn’t meet Jeno’s eyes.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Jeno clears his throat, wracked with nerves. What was he even thinking? “You don’t – I don’t know why –“</p><p>“I already said you can, didn’t I?” Renjun pouts – clueless as to what he’s doing to Jeno looking that adorable – “so don’t take it back now! Just, do it…”</p><p>Jeno swallows, “a-are you sure –“</p><p>“Oh my God, you’re impossible! Can’t you see how awkward it is just – waiting?!” Renjun shouts, and with that, Jeno scrambles to close the distance between them.</p><p>Renjun’s lips are soft and plump, a little sweet and sour from the berries he just had. Jeno presses their lips together gently, seeking permission to deepen the kiss by sweeping his tongue over the swell of Renjun's bottom lip. With waning uncertainty, Renjun parts his lips for Jeno to press further.</p><p>Jeno cups Renjun’s cheek, slowly guiding him – Renjun’s inexperience clear from the shyness of his kisses, the stiffness of his movements. It’s cute. Renjun’s cute.</p><p>He pulls away, and Renjun whines <em>so softly</em> at the loss of contact before Jeno pulls him onto his lap and takes his lips again.</p><p>This time, Renjun is more ardent, unabashed as his hands roam over Jeno’s body. Carding through his hair, stroking his nape, gripping onto his shoulder when Jeno holds him by the waist and slots Renjun’s pliant body against him. The angle and Renjun snug against his body allows him to kiss him better, yearning but also, gentle.</p><p>The sunshine is warm on his arms and cheeks, the flowers and dry grass rustles with the wind. Jeno’s insides are on fire, a pleasant burn spreading throughout his lungs from breathlessness as they kiss for what feels like forever. And it’s still not enough.</p><p>But Renjun eventually pulls away out of breath, fingers curled against Jeno’s shirt when they part.</p><p>Jeno leans back to soak in the sight of Renjun, brighter than the sun with his shy smile and tousled hair, lips rivalling all the cherries and red liquorice in the world. Sweet, and red, and plump with a sheen of saliva from being sucked and licked.</p><p>Renjun wipes his mouth, curls a hand to cover – or hide – his eyes. He looks past Jeno at the sunflowers behind him.</p><p>“We should – um – go back. My mum wanted me back to help around the house in the afternoon.”</p><p>“Okay,” Jeno nods, and they get to packing up.</p><p>This time, it’s Jeno who leads Renjun out of the field. It’s a different feeling now, holding Renjun’s hand, and while his heart still flutters, there is also a resounding peace that spreads across his collarbones, between his shoulder blades, all the way down to his toes. It’s both comforting and grounding.</p><p>He can’t wait to kiss Renjun again.</p><p>They wait by the bus stop. Renjun crouches down in the sliver of shade provided by Jeno’s body and the bus stop sign, clutching onto Jeno’s hand, head tucked between his knees. His pink hat sits tight around his head, raincoat spilling out of the unzipped seam of his backpack.</p><p>Not unsurprisingly, the bus is empty when it arrives, so they’re free to sit anywhere they like. Jeno takes them to two seats in the middle and lets Renjun in first to sit by the window. The heat quickly dissipates to be replaced by air-conditioned coolness.</p><p>Jeno sighs from relief, finally turning to look at Renjun, who hasn’t faced him since they left the field.</p><p>“You okay?”</p><p>Renjun turns away from the window, from the fleeting sunshine meadows, the valleys, the blue sky. He regards him for a moment, “Yeah, why?”</p><p>“You’re very quiet,” then, with spiking anxiousness, he slowly asks, “do you regret it? The kiss?”</p><p>His heart slips, trips. Had Jeno just been feeling euphoric by himself, without any consideration of Renjun’s feelings?</p><p>Renjun’s eyes widen, his expression marred by rising guilt at Jeno’s nervous words, “no! No, that’s not it… don’t misunderstand. I’m just…”</p><p>He trails off, his cheeks dusting the prettiest shade of pink that Jeno’s ever seen. He averts his eyes to his lap and doesn’t say more.</p><p><em>Oh.</em> Jeno grins. <em>He’s shy.</em></p><p>“Can I do it again?” Jeno asks, clutching Renjun’s hands. He glances over at the bus driver whose eyes were fixed on the road – obviously – and breathes out, “can I kiss you again?”</p><p>“Now?” Renjun asks, rhetorically, because he’s already closing his eyes, expectant and waiting.</p><p>Jeno presses a chaste kiss to his lips, then another on his nose.</p><p>Renjun scrunches his face, rubbing his cheeks with his knuckles.</p><p>Then, he leans against Jeno’s arm as he gazes out the window, watching the mountainous landscape disappear by the signs of civilization as they draw nearer and nearer back home.</p><p>Jeno slips an arm around Renjun’s waist and leans his head against his. Heart fuller than it’s been in ages, Jeno doesn’t worry. Not about a thing.</p><p>-</p><p>There are perks to dating Renjun. For starters, he is <em>dating Renjun</em>, and that in itself is the biggest perk. Then along with it come the sub-perks, which are kissing him, touching him, cuddling him, holding his hands, as well as being the recipient of his adoring and affectionate smile.</p><p>While Jeno’s days with his grandparents weren’t dull to start with, with Renjun as they are now, his days are significantly brighter. Jeno’s had his fair share of dating experience, but Renjun – Renjun is something else.</p><p>Renjun is new. He is shy, but so eager to learn – to please – when Jeno presses him down on the grass as the running stream fades to white noise at the back. So pliant, when Jeno presses him against his sheets under the light of the moon slanting in through his bedroom window.</p><p>His touches are feathery-light when his hands roam across Jeno’s body exploratorily, warm on Jeno’s skin, leaving a trail of tiny fires in their wake. His touches are grounding when he places a hand on Jeno’s shoulder and lets Jeno explore his mouth, the expanse of his neck, the curves of his collarbones.</p><p>His skin is hot when Jeno slips a hand under his shirt, his whimpers are <em>lethal</em> when Jeno trails open-mouth kisses down his neck. He surrenders under Jeno’s weight, wrapping his arms and legs around him as Jeno slowly kisses his open.</p><p>Needless to say, making out has quickly become their favourite activity, only stopping when their both out of breath or too hot and bothered to be pressed against each other without – mainly Jeno – losing his senses.</p><p>It’s an afternoon at Renjun’s house and Renjun’s just squirmed out from under his human cage (Jeno) following said favourite activity. His lips are plumper than ever, cherry red and bitten. His face is flushed down to his neck and hair a mess.</p><p>Jeno smugly grins at his work.</p><p>“Anyway,” Renjun says with an exhale as he fixes his hair and clothes, “I was going to show you something before you so rudely interrupted me.”</p><p>Jeno scoffs, “rudely?! You seemed pretty eager to me.”</p><p>“Shut up.” Renjun retorts before diving under the bed to pull out a large cardboard box. Inside there is a small stack of papers – articles from newspapers and online that appear to be dating back a good couple of years – as well as some more of Renjun’s photos and a little portable radio which Renjun picks up.</p><p>“Ta-da!” Renjun says, presenting the device in front of Jeno’s face with a look of glee.</p><p>Jeno raises a brow, “what is it?”</p><p>“It’s a communication device,” Renjun explains as he pulls out the antenna. “This here is the receiver. And this,” he twists the round knob at the side, “is the tuner.”</p><p>“So… this is used what you use to talk to your alien friends?” Jeno asks slowly, growing more and more endeared as Renjun practically bounces in his spot.</p><p>“Yes! Well – sort of! I can’t say anything back, but I can pick up signals!” Renjun rummages through the box again and brings out another tiny rectangular object. He clicks it onto the back of the radio. “This is another kind of receiver but it has a larger range. So, it can detect signals from galaxies millions of lightyears away.”</p><p>“And, you know this for sure?”</p><p>Renjun nods, expression taut with seriousness, “Of course I do! My brother and I made it together, and it’s worked, at times!”</p><p>Then Renjun pulls out a file from underneath the articles and shows Jeno his recordings of all the transmissions he’s gotten over the years. The more recent it was, the more articulate his recording.</p><p>“You… think it’s weird, don’t you?” Renjun mumbles in response to Jeno’s silence.</p><p>“No!” Jeno reassures him quickly, crouching down to meet Renjun’s gaze. He smiles, “I actually think it’s kinda cool. You put a lot of effort into your research.”</p><p>Renjun brightens up instantly, his face breaking into a grin. His eyes shining. “Really? I told you! It’s so cool when you think about it, and even more when you read other people’s experiences!”</p><p>Then he climbs back onto the bed, hauling the box up with him, and spreads the articles around in front of them. He picks one out and introduces it as the newspaper article that got him so interested in outer space – an anonymous recount of an alien encounter, or something close, from nearly twenty years ago that happened around the town.</p><p>Jeno pulls Renjun close to his side and hooks his chin on the smaller male’s shoulder. His eyes follow along as Renjun reads out loud (and adds his own commentary). Jeno simply listens. And although more sceptical part of his brain can’t help but doubt the article and its inconsistencies, he keeps mum and lets Renjun wonder. Tells himself, perhaps, such infinite hope can be a good thing.</p><p>-</p><p>Turns out, Jeno spoke too soon, when a few nights later, he is rudely woken in the middle of the night by the incessant buzzing of his phone. In a sleepy haze, he feels around the bed for the device and answers it with a groan.</p><p>“Jeno!”</p><p>Renjun’s frantic voice over the speaker snaps him awake.</p><p>“Ren? What’s wrong?”</p><p>“Open the front door, I’m coming over!”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“It’s an emergency!” Is all Renjun leaves him with before the call drops.</p><p>Jeno blankly stares at his phone screen, collecting his thoughts and what just happened, before finally rolling out of bed with a groan.</p><p>True to his word, Renjun shows up almost as soon as Jeno opens the door. He’s wearing his pyjamas, only with a down jacket thrown on top to fight the summer night’s breeze and his backpack slung over his shoulders.</p><p>“What’s going on?” Jeno asks him once they’re inside his room. Renjun had rushed up and tore open his bag as soon as he got in, taking out a transcript and some photos.</p><p>“They’re coming,” Renjun says and splays out the documents. “Tonight.”</p><p>Jeno takes a couple of seconds to recover. “What?”</p><p>“All the signs lead to tonight, at around 3 am, planet Earth, and more specifically, our small town will be visited by our friends from outer space!”</p><p>Renjun is practically bursting with excitement as he spoke, bouncing in his spot, but he is clearly trying his best to remain collected. Before Jeno can ask him to explain further, Renjun pulls out his folder of research.</p><p>“I’ve been pinpointing all the signs and clues that occurred before every extra-terrestrial occurrence in the past. The timing, the stars, <em>the weather</em> – everything is in the exact place!” He waves the radio transcript in front of Jeno’s face, “is the final piece to confirm my calculations.”</p><p>Jeno stares dumbly as Renjun packs all his papers away again. “So,” he starts – and then stops because he has <em>no idea</em> of what exactly he wants to say – what he’s meant to say.</p><p>His silence clearly says enough for Renjun, who turns around slowly, suddenly looking smaller than ever.</p><p>“You think I’m being crazy again, don’t you?” He mumbles. With a half-hearted chuckle, he throws on his bag, “sorry, it’s insanely late and you were sleeping and I disturbed you with my crazy I’ll just go –“</p><p>“Wait – no, Renjun.” Jeno stops him, grabs him by the shoulders, and leans closer, “Yeah, I do think you’re being a little crazy, but strangely it’s one of the things I love most about you.”</p><p>Renjun rolls his eyes. Jeno smiles.</p><p>“What I was going to ask is… where do we need to go?”</p><p>Renjun grins, his eyes twinkling.</p><p> </p><p>Ten minutes later, Jeno finds himself in the driver’s seat of his grandad’s truck. Renjun is around the back, securing his telescope to the bed before he joins him in the passenger seat.</p><p>“I shouldn’t be doing this,” Jeno says, hands hovering above the steering wheel. “I don’t have a license yet.”</p><p>“Don’t be a baby. You said you’ve taken lessons, you’ll be fine.”</p><p>The fact does little to reassure Jeno, but he grips the wheel anyway. Knuckles white.</p><p>“So, where are we going again?”</p><p>“Old Man Park’s sunflower field.”</p><p>“You know the way?”</p><p>Renjun nods, then leans over and kisses Jeno on the cheek. “Don’t worry, you’ve got me here. I know what I’m doing.”</p><p>Jeno takes a deep breath, “Alright then,” and starts the engine.</p><p>The town is fast asleep, streets void of any signs of life as they drive through. Their only light, the moon, and the few flickering streetlamps that stretch across the long road.</p><p>Jeno keeps his eyes trained in front of him as Renjun chats away, explaining to Jeno about his calculations, the numerous signs that clued him in on this discovery.</p><p>“According to a lot of articles, strange happenings such as disease in the land, water, or even irregular behaviour from animals, can be preceding signs of extra-terrestrial activity.”</p><p>“And you’re connecting this to the blight?” Jeno asks.</p><p>“Precisely!” Renjun snaps his fingers, “Mountain ranges, such as the one encasing our very town, and large open plains also create the ideal location for such activities.”</p><p>Jeno holds his breath as he makes a narrow turn, avoiding an island in the middle of the road.</p><p>“I thought aliens usually landed in cornfields or something.”</p><p>Renjun tuts disapprovingly, “that’s only in movies, Jeno. Those are stereotypes. These,” he shakes the papers in the air, “are the facts.”</p><p>Jeno gives him a quick look, a small smile tugging on his lips. “Right.”</p><p>Soon the road opens to flat plains and mountain terrain in the distance, dark peaks looming beyond the stretch of still land. Trees stood ghost-like, tall, swaying with the midnight breeze. The sky – a sea of stars above.</p><p>The scenery rushes by.</p><p>“What do you plan on doing or saying to them?” Jeno asks, breaking the silence that had settled between them. “If they – uhh – come.”</p><p>Renjun turns away from the window to face him. He shrugs his shoulders. “I haven’t thought that far ahead. And frankly, I think I’d be content with just looking. I wouldn’t want to scare them off.” He looks to the road, “and, they <em>will</em> come. My calculations are perfect.”</p><p> “Right,” Jeno holds back a laugh, “because <em>we’ll </em>be the scary ones.”</p><p>“Have you <em>seen</em> humanity?”</p><p>“…touché,” Jeno admits. Renjun himself can be a little scary when excited. “They also probably won’t understand us. We probably won’t understand them.”</p><p>Renjun pouts, “True… which is a shame, because there’s so much I’d like to ask – you know, if a conversation is possible.”</p><p>They return to stillness as Jeno drives on; the road endless before them. Renjun turns on his side and rests his cheek against the seat, quietly watching Jeno.</p><p>Finally, Jeno spots the familiar bus stop. “Do you want me to park around here?”</p><p>“No, go straight to the field.”</p><p>When they arrive, Jeno stops the truck opposite the field as Renjun directs. Then, it was only a matter of waiting out the time frame Renjun had calculated – from 3 am, an hour.</p><p>They move to the truck bed where Renjun pulls out a small blanket from his backpack and spreads it out for them to lay in. He also takes out some snacks – licorice sticks and gummy snakes. Jeno has a peeve about eating after he’s already brushed his teeth for the night, but for the sweet treats, he ignores it easily. He reaches for the gummies immediately while Renjun sets up his telescope.</p><p>They recline against the body of the truck, snuggled against each other with their jackets pulled tight around them. Renjun looks up at the sky and stretches his hand up, grasping at the stars. He closes his eyes and exhales deeply.</p><p>“It’s so pretty, isn’t it?”</p><p>Jeno hums in agreement. Before Renjun, he’d have never thought <em>stargazing</em> would be interesting, or worth so much of his time.</p><p>Jeno stretches out his hand too, over Renjun’s, and follows his gaze towards the night sky. It’s bursting with stars, glittering in the darkness, for miles and miles. He looks away, afraid if he stares for too long, the endless, starry sea would drown him.</p><p>His gaze falls on Renjun, whose eyes are shut. Hair fluttering in the wind and eyelids darting rapidly.</p><p>Then suddenly Renjun’s eyes flutter open, and they’re filled with stars. Like a thousand dancing lights trapped in the dark orbs. The light pools at the edges, but Renjun blinks them away.</p><p>Jeno takes Renjun’s hand in his, slowly laces their fingers together, and brings their hands down to his chest.</p><p>He can tell Renjun’s nervous, from the way he constantly keeps checking his watch and then scans the sky using his telescope. 3 am is still a while away. Jeno’s starting to think Renjun might pass out from sheer stress.</p><p>“Ren,” Jeno pulls Renjun back by the waist and tucks him into his side, “relax. We got here so early we might as well take a nap.”</p><p>“No! I don’t wanna miss anything! There’s bound to be more signs before the actual arrival.”</p><p>Eventually, Jeno convinces Renjun to lie down at least, because, despite his insistence that he isn’t tired, his sleepy eyes say otherwise.</p><p>As they wait, lying down flat on the spread blanket, Renjun introduces Jeno to the constellations. To Leo, the lion that terrorized the countryside, to Aires the ram, and Taurus the bull that Jeno thinks looks more like a body outline at a crime scene.</p><p>Renjun swats him for it.</p><p>“I’m sorry.” He later mumbles into Jeno’s chest.</p><p>“For?”</p><p>“I know you’d rather be doing anything else right now, and this is getting kinda boring.”</p><p>Jeno lifts Renjun’s chin to catch his gaze, “That’s not true. I like doing this with you. I’d like anything, with you.”</p><p>Renjun averts his eyes and mutters something about how cheesy Jeno is, to which Jeno responds with a wide grin.</p><p>As the night air begins to still, and the world is quieter than ever, Renjun yawns – defeated.</p><p>“Close your eyes for a bit. I’ll set an alarm.”</p><p>In his tired daze, Renjun ends up complying easily – but only after watching Jeno set the alarm.</p><p>“Wake me up if <em>anything</em> happens, okay?” And then he’s out like a light.</p><p>Meanwhile, Jeno remains awake. The world far too open for him to fall asleep comfortably, and the silence of it all allows his thoughts to emerge from their crevices and run amok.</p><p>In a week, at this hour, he’ll be back in his bedroom in Seoul. Far away from open plains, fast winds, and clear night skies. Far away from Renjun.</p><p>And they will try to stay in touch, test this thing between them through the distance, but Jeno will soon have to think about college and dorms and classes and friends. He’ll go back to being busy, go back to running against the clock ticking away on his youth.</p><p>And Renjun will be here. He’ll still be here because he probably won’t follow after Jeno, right? Because why would he leave his family and his fishes and his stars?</p><p>Lost in his thoughts, Jeno doesn’t realize the time until his phone buzzes in his pocket. Renjun stirs beside him, still sound asleep. His weight against Jeno’s side the only thing grounding him.</p><p>Despite himself, Jeno keeps his promise to Renjun and checks for <em>anything</em> happening in the plains around them. He’s doubtful anything will happen, within the hour or even later, but he checks for Renjun anyway.</p><p>After all, the last thing he wants is for Renjun’s hopes to be dashed, all his research and calculations to be waste. The last thing he wants is for the twinkling lights in Renjun’s eyes to be dimmed down to nothing.</p><p>
  <em>Even if deep down, he knows it’s inevitable. For Renjun, he tries to believe.</em>
</p><p>Renjun wakes up by himself a few minutes later when Jeno tries to turn on his side.</p><p>“Sorry,” Jeno hurriedly whispers as Renjun’s eyes flutter open.</p><p>The latter ignores him and frantically sits up, “what’d I miss?!”</p><p>“Nothing,” Jeno assures him, sitting up as well, “you can keep lying down.”</p><p>“Nuh-uh. I need to be up now.” Renjun says so seriously that Jeno doesn’t bother to press further. Instead, he crawls up to where Renjun is kneeling in front of his telescope and watches the plains with him.</p><p>The next hour grows tense with every passing minute in which nothing, absolutely nothing, happens.</p><p>Renjun’s frown starts to deepen, as he tries to busy himself with re-checking his calculations, re-consulting his radio transmissions and all his research. Jeno too grows worried.</p><p>“Ren.”</p><p>The smaller male turns at the call and holds his gaze as Jeno struggles to find the best words to soften the blow.</p><p>“I can’t give up.” Renjun’s face softens into a small smile. Laced with a tinge of bitterness as he adds, “the hour isn’t even up yet. There’s always hope.”</p><p>So Jeno doesn’t say anything. Not even when Renjun later crawls into his lap and nuzzles his neck, an exhausted sigh fanning Jeno’s skin.</p><p>Jeno ducks his head and kisses the corner of Renjun’s lips, then his cheek, then the corner of his eye until Renjun moves to capture his lips fully.</p><p>Thanks to all the practice, Renjun’s kisses are confident now. No longer shy but hungry, and right now, with a little desperation. Jeno hums into the kiss as Renjun presses close to his body, and lightly strokes his nape.</p><p>Jeno’s heart thumps loudly in his chest. His head spins as Renjun slowly pushes him down and kisses him deeper. Jeno wraps an arm tightly around Renjun’s waist and gently strokes his thigh with the other.</p><p>When they part, it’s past 4. Far away, sunlight bleeds into the night sky.</p><p>Renjun doesn’t say a word as he crawls off. Face growing darker as the minutes' tick by, even though it’s past his calculations already.</p><p>The sky is pink with twilight when they turn back.</p><p>-</p><p>It’s been two nights since their little night mission. Two nights in which Renjun had not brought out his telescope to the window.</p><p>It breaks Jeno’s heart to see Renjun so hopeless, so resigned.</p><p>“It’s not that I don’t like the stars anymore, or that I’m never going to stargaze ever again,” Renjun says into his cup when Jeno asks him again, “I’m just… trying to see things with my own eyes for a change.”</p><p>Jeno smiles. His heart lightens. “What about your alien friends?”</p><p>Renjun thinks for a moment, tapping his chin theatrically, “I still believe. The universe is too vast and too strange to <em>not</em> believe. My mission isn’t over yet – this is just a little setback.”</p><p>It’s clear Renjun’s trying to hide how disappointed he feels, and how much it’s affected his mood. Since they got back, and especially knowing that Jeno would be leaving soon, Renjun’s been working extra hard to keep things light, refusing to address his emotions related to both that night and the future of their relationship once Jeno’s back in the city.</p><p>And Jeno – doesn’t have the heart to bring them up either.</p><p>Turns out he doesn’t have to.</p><p>His grandma does it for them.</p><p>“Spend your time together well, you two!” She says in passing the next morning just as Renjun and Jeno are about to head out. “It’s going to be so sad when Jeno has to go next week.”</p><p>Renjun doesn’t say anything in response. Jeno just gives her a quick nod and smile before they leave.</p><p>On today’s agenda is a quick stop at the stream to visit the fish before they head into the town.</p><p>The air is quiet as they walk. Hands brushing past each other; midday sun hot on their backs. Jeno knows they need to talk. He even musters up the courage to, many times. But as soon as he looks at Renjun, who’s eyes are transfixed ahead, the words die in his throat.</p><p>
  <em>Is it so bad to want to stay in this bubble of delusion forever?</em>
</p><p>When they reach the stream, Renjun hops across first while Jeno chooses to hang back and watch. He needs some space to think. To look at Renjun from a distance and mull over all the changes the impending future will bring.</p><p>Then Renjun calls for him and snaps Jeno back to attention.</p><p>Jeno looks back at him, the fog clearing away from his eyes. The sun shines and turns the brown of Renjun’s hair into gold. He is bathed in sunlight, glistening around his arms and legs where the running water had splashed as it hit the rocks.</p><p>And it’s just like seeing him for the first time.</p><p>“Jeno, what’re you brooding about over there?” Renjun repeats his question.</p><p>“Nothing,” Jeno says, a little too seriously for his own liking. So he adds with a smug smile, “I’m thinking about you.”</p><p>Renjun isn’t having any of it. He rolls his eyes away and looks down at the water again. He stays like that for a while.</p><p>Jeno steps onto the first stone.</p><p>“Are you thinking about breaking up?”</p><p>There’s a slight tremor in Renjun’s voice that is almost deafened by the sound of the water. Jeno doesn’t miss it though.</p><p>The wind picks up. The cicadas chirp. The water gushes and the trees rustle and Jeno’s skin pricks with heat.</p><p>“Do you want that?”</p><p>Renjun keeps his head low and bites his lip. “No, do you?”</p><p>Jeno takes the second step. “No. But it’ll be hard. I won’t be able to visit often and, I’ll get busy soon.”</p><p>This time, Renjun hops a step back across. Then another. Then he’s standing in front of Jeno.</p><p>“I’m not that worried.” He says, and his eyes are shining again as they look up at Jeno. “Maybe I can visit?”</p><p>“You’re really not that worried?” Jeno asks, a little bewildered. He feels a little silly too. Was he overthinking things?</p><p>Renjun pretends to think deeply as he taps his chin and hums. “I guess I’m a <em>little</em> worried,” he admits, bring his thumb and forefinger impossibly close, “but, anything can happen. So, I should at least be hopeful, right?”</p><p>“I… I guess so.”</p><p>Seeing Jeno so stunned, Renjun reaches up and squeezes his cheeks, teasing him for looking so serious.</p><p>“I like you, and you <em>clearly </em>like me –“</p><p>Jeno rolls his eyes, even though it’s true, because he likes the smile it brings to Renjun’s lips.</p><p>“So as long as we have that, we shouldn’t be too worried.”</p><p>They make their way back across the stream to the field by the playground and lay down on the grass. Side by side, Renjun watches the clouds roll across the blue sky and Jeno watches Renjun. The grass is prickly against their skin.</p><p>“Besides,” Renjun continues after a while of mindless cloud-watching, “I’m thinking about taking my research further. Maybe the city will give me some more answers to the wonders of the universe.”</p><p>Jeno’s breath hitches. He whips his head around to Renjun. “Really? What about your stars?”</p><p>Renjun smiles and turns to his side, wriggles close to Jeno until they are almost nose to nose.</p><p>“They’re never really gone, Jeno. Not if you look hard enough. And, you know me.”</p><p>He doesn’t have to finish the sentence for Jeno to get it.</p><p>Then Renjun grins, eyes crinkling at the corners. Jeno watches them twinkle – and doesn’t doubt him. Not a bit.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading until the end! I feel like I say this every time but I'm planning on something new to be out quite soon so I hope you can look forward to it. Thanks again for everyone's support! Pls do leave kudos and comments, I really appreciate them!</p><p>Talk to me on twt: <a href="https://twitter.com/xinqrens">xinqrens</a><br/>Or: <a href="https://curiouscat.me/angelcakkes">cc</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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